This is who we voted for back in the day.
Are we really surprised therefore that it ended up this way?
By the ‘ouses of Westminster, lookin’ lazy ‘cross the square,
There’s a blond ‘aired unkempt geezer, was the Mayor of London fair.
For ‘e smiles at all the Londoners wot’s ridin’ Boris bikes,
And ‘is new routemaster buses got ‘im lots of facebook likes.
Lovable buffoon
Idiotic goon
Charismatic loon
The new P.M we say, to take the job from May.
The 2012 Olympics, Old Blighty, London now again,
‘e whizzed in on a zipwire to take the openin’, bloomin’, flame.
‘e shuddered to a screechin’ ‘alt, millions ‘cross the world to see,
A plonker, danglin’ hangin’ there- England’s finest all for free!
Mayor of London town
Won’t let ‘is people down
Successful ‘lympic clown
The new P.M we say, to take the job from May.
A journalist career, the Times, the Daily Telegraph,
Got sacked for making up false quotes, but that was just a “blarsted larf”!
TV, showbiz, host of “Have I got News for You”,
Editor of the Spectator, a satirical review.
Mayor – twice
M.P – thrice
Foreign Secretary – at what price?
The new P.M we say, to take the job from May.
“Extra Brexit dosh for NHS”, – ‘e’s not ‘arf keen to speak,
Very good at insults, putting foot in, “Wot a cheek!”
*”A ruthless manipulative tyrant who looks like Dobby the elf,
**An arrogant, powerful idiot – who looks just like meself.”
Nazarin Radcliffe – he says only training journalists,
Enough evidence for Iran – prison sentence increased.
Others rate ‘im poor
A lunatic, a bore
***A lazy tosser – out the door
The new P.M we say, to take the job from May.
On official trip to Myanmar, he quotes a Kipling poem,
The ambassador turns white with fear at Boris’ jokey tone.
“Er petticoat was yaller an ‘er little cap was green,”
He continued with authority, “…the same as Theebaw’s queen”.
The UK rep stared at the mic and pointed where he stood,
Boris never got to say:
“Bloomin’ idol made o’ mud,
Wot they called the Great Gawd Budd”
Diplomatic prat,
Upper classic twat,
Does Boris not know that?
The new P.M we say, to take the job from May.
By Guernsey Gwen
*Boris on Putin ** Boris on Trump *** Ken Livingstone on Boris